Traces in the History of Swedish Transnational Adoption—A Diffractive Mapping through the Voices of Adoptees and Their Parents
Abstract
:1. Introduction
2. Background
The World Has Changed
Democracy is better than dictatorship. Wealth is better than poverty. Enlightenment is better than folklore. Honesty is better than corruption. Nevertheless, rosy-cheeked Swedish wishes for the future do not solve children’s problems today. ‘Wait for a better world!’ becomes the inquiry’s message to abandoned children and childless Swedes. Here lies the inquiry’s incomprehensible thinking error.
We are working with countries that often have relatively complicated domestic situations. It is quite obvious that most countries with Swedish prosperity, and with normal democracy, do not need any orphanages, let alone international adoption. One should also be humble about the situation those children face in the countries where it occurs. However, that can never be an excuse to turn a blind eye.(Ulf Kristersson, in the Swedish Parliament on 24 November 2022, Kristersson 2022)
Now, we cannot go on with shut eyes. We know the truth about the systematic theft of children and that it continued in Sweden—in the name of goodness.
3. Materials, Methods, and Perspectives
4. The Adoption Triangle
4.1. The Adoptive Parents
We witnessed the children in the orphanages, children condemned to grow up in orphanage prisons. Children who lacked most things, above all love. We were fueled by righteous anger and could not accept that children were left there when we knew many wanted to be their parents. We tried and found that we could match children who needed parents with adults who wanted to become parents.
In times of change, the family, its resources, and opportunities also change. In the age of change, everyone is a pioneer. We no longer have ready-made patterns to try to fit reality into—we have to create them ourselves. /.../ Adopting a child is no longer a last resort for those who cannot have children of their own, but rather an opportunity for all adults who love children and are willing and able to take responsibility for one or more children.
When the [transnational] adoptions began, we had a more naive approach. We believed the children were ‘born’ when they arrived at Arlanda [the international airport in Stockholm], and we assumed they would always remain small and never question their origins. We thought that as long as we loved them, everything would be fine.(Cited from Gudmundsson et al. 2017, p. 71)
To adopt a child could also be viewed as an opportunity to expand the concept of adoption itself by demonstrating that adoption is not a second choice for lack of better for those who cannot give birth to children of their own, but rather an equally appealing alternative for those who already have children of their own.
Anyone who views international adoptions primarily as a form of aid directed towards developing countries is mistaken. Instead, adoption entails collaboration between countries for mutual assistance. Families in our country provide homes and parents for children in need. The greatest source of gratitude lies on our side.(Socialstyrelsen 1974, p. 7; cited from Lindgren 2010, p. 36)
Lisa and Daniel have never had any problems with their color, hair, or anything like that, strangely enough. No one has ever yelled nigger at them. We have tried to use the words ourselves, calling the kids ‘nigger’ and ‘chink’, to kind of de-dramatize the words themselves in all possible contexts.
There is a cure for infertility. It’s called adoption.(Adoptive mother of two children from Korea, Kats 1975, p. 139).
We have had two children who have been completely trouble-free, and then two who have been extremely difficult but where everything has straightened out over time. And then one that we have completely failed with. /.../… maybe parents should know a little more about this kind of thing before they adopt. How tough it can be. And how easy it can be at other times. I mean—people who would never dream of wanting to take care of a environmentally damaged Swedish child for example, why do they think everything will be easier if the child is Korean or Ethiopian or something else from afar.(Adoptive parent, interviewed in Kats 1975, pp. 176–77)
We have not had any problems with Anna and Gita looking foreign. Anna is very pleased with herself and her appearance overall. She thinks that Korean children are much more beautiful than other children… Gita is very dark and apparently had problems with it already in India, where they are also very conscious of color. Now she seems to care less about it, she has such a cheerful disposition and doesn’t take offense, it just rolls off her.
I eventually went to CAD, realizing that we needed help with this. But I can’t say that we got much help. The whole family therapy thing seems to be the big theory right now, viewing the child as a symptom of the ‘sick family’. But that doesn’t fit these kids at all; they don’t fit into that mold, and it didn’t seem like anyone else had any other ideas.(Mother of five children, three of whom are adopted, interviewed in Kats 1975, p. 110).
Adoptees carry with them two distinct narratives of their past. They inherit both the familial history of the adoptive family and the familial history of the biological relatives with whom they have no direct contact. This uncharted lineage can often manifest as emotional baggage, and as a parent, it is my duty to address my children’s emotional burdens and assist them in navigating their unknown lineage. Ideally, I aim to facilitate a connection to their roots by helping them establish a link to their country of origin.(Interview with a Swedish adoptive parent, prepared for adoption in the early 1990s, quoted from Bosseldal 2014).
Through the child, the family can have a special relationship with another country, another culture, and another social world. The child’s biological family can become part of the family.
4.2. The Adoptees
The constant anxiety before meeting new people, having to explain this gap between the Swedish name and the non-Swedish appearance. /.../ The anxiety of knowing that the declaration “adopted” will lead to follow-up questions of a far too personal kind. Did you live in an orphanage? For how long? How come your parents in Korea could not take care of you?
One day, my mother said to me, ‘You know you are from China and that you are adopted’. It sounded like the prelude to a serious conversation. I stopped her and said:- Yes, I know much more about that than you.
As an overseas adoptee, you lose your roots and sense of belonging, which makes you feel vulnerable. When I’m in Sweden, I look Korean, and when I’m in Korea, I feel Swedish. I feel great sorrow for the loss of Korean language and culture.
When we [adoptees from Korea] come to Sweden, we have to give up our Korean identity, and it doesn’t matter if we are five weeks old or seven years old. We are emptied of our inclusive Koreanness, and /…/ filled up with Swedishness. /…/ When the adoptee leaves the adoptive family to become an adult, the immigrant identity is waiting. From a privileged adopted child with adoptive parents who fight to make their adopted children believe that they are “special”, not immigrants, the adult adoptee becomes just one of many other non-white immigrants.
Since my parents could not have children of their own, they chose to adopt instead. The nice thing about being adopted is knowing you are wanted, maybe even more than other children. It is not like we came here by mistake; our parents really had to fight to get us here.
I was separated from my mother as a newborn. Did she even get to hold me? The image of that separation, stored as a sorrow in my body over the years, now put me in total darkness.
She is angry with those who think she does not like Denmark because she has moved to South Korea. For her, moving to South Korea is about understanding her history and, thus, the history of South Korea, about getting access to one’s history.She is angry with herself for thinking that adopted Koreans who move to South Korea did not thrive in their adoptive countries. There are many reasons why adopted Koreans migrate /…/ She finds it interesting how remigration challenges the notion that transnational adoption is a movement from one country to another, from donor country to recipient country. When adopted Koreans choose to move to South Korea, she says, it opens an understanding of transnational adoption as a movement that does not necessarily end when one arrives in one’s adoptive country.She is angry that she does not feel she fits in her adopted country.She is angry that she does not feel she fits in her country of origin. In some ways, she feels she fits in South Korea, and in other ways, she feels she fits in Denmark. Regarding nature, she feels that she fits in better in South Korea than in Denmark. The mountains suit her temperament better than the flat Danish countryside.
I am most ashamed, ashamed of Sweden. I feel bad personally because I am part of Sweden. Sure, I have a dual identity. I am Swedish, but I am also adopted from Ethiopia. However, it does not have to become schizophrenic if you allow yourself to cultivate both sides. Some believe that you must decide, but you can be both.
In my teens, I dated a guy who was also adopted from Korea. And then I really felt like a Chinese! People did not understand that we were adopted, and I thought it was a bit difficult. However, I do not think he thought so because he was in a process where he was searching for his origins. I think that is why he wanted to be with me.
… for those adoptees who do perceive themselves as culturally Swedish and who wish to be acknowledged as Swedes, the visual effects of having a foreign origin constitute the primary reminder of their foreign origin. For them, explicit and positive acknowledgement of their black hair, brown skin, or almond-shaped eyes, in addition to their indisputable right to be considered as Swedes, may constitute a better preparation for questions that challenge their self-perception as Swedes than encouragement to feel proud of the cultures of their birth countries and hence to adjust their cultural identification to match the geographical marks on their bodies. Just as transnational adoptees’ feelings of pride in their foreign origins would be assisted by a more genuine appreciation of multiculturalism, their sense of belonging in Sweden must be buttressed by a broadened concept of Swedishness that does not only automatically include those who are white.
When adoptees themselves emphasized the importance of origin, and the adoption triad was recognized, the neglect of biological parents should have ended. Instead, a new group has emerged that, time and again, puts forward the opinion that the only parents adoptees have are the adoptive parents. The group receives much space in the media and mainly consists of successful adoptees /…/ Their mantra is: adoptees only have one mother and one father! And thus, these adoptees accept the view that the biological parents are unimportant.
During my first pregnancy, these questions [about my biological mother’s pregnancy and delivery] reminded me that my body is a mystery. That I am a person manifested out of nothing, without anchoring. Not born, but still here. When I discovered I was pregnant and expecting my first child, it was as if she took over my body and soul, that mythological mother. As if it was her, I was carrying and not my son. It hit me then, like a shock, that I, too, had once lain in someone’s womb. That also my life had begun on the inside of another human being.
I finally got a complete story, and it had always been there and could be put together, even those parts that had been separated. The meeting with these parents also gave insight that one never forgets the child one has relinquished or surrendered. One does not surrender a child without grieving, without missing, without perhaps regretting or wondering how the child has fared.
We do not want to hurt adoptive parents, [but] every time we strive not to do so, by downplaying and embellishing adoptees’ experiences, we undervalue and disqualify these experiences.(Hanna Wallensten, adopted from Ethiopia, in Arpi 2020).
Adoptees’ challenges have long been attributed to a difficult background in their birth countries. Therefore, there is a risk of not recognizing and addressing when children also suffer in adoptive families. /.../ The role of adoptive parents has slipped under the radar. It is poorly examined in research, and therefore, it is challenging to know if the difficult, tragic, and dysfunctional examples are isolated cases or if there are patterns and risks that have been overlooked.(Hanna Wallensten, interviewed in Arpi 2023, pp. 170–71)
4.3. The Biological Parents
When prospective parents must pay more for the adoption than the actual expenses for their child, children tend to become commodities. Even if the money is used for a good cause, such a payment must never become a condition for a child to become available for adoption.
Since the fifties, the international adoption industry has inflicted enormous pain and deepest uncertainty on these mothers and fathers. Case after case passes review, revealing an industry primarily involved in trafficking children. Swedish authorities and adoption organizations have relied on the countries of origin to ensure the legality of adoptions. However, it is often from corrupt countries or dictatorships that children are taken.(Greider 2022, Dagens Nyheter, 3 October 2022)
5. Concluding Discussion
Funding
Institutional Review Board Statement
Informed Consent Statement
Acknowledgments
Conflicts of Interest
1 | In later debates about racism and discrimination in Sweden, the term ‘race’ is replaced with ‘ethnicity’, as the very use of the concept of race is perceived as an expression of racism and consequently taboo (Hübinette 2021). |
2 | If not otherwise stated, translations from Swedish editions into English are made by the author of this article. |
3 | The reasons for the decrease are multidimensional and have to do with circumstances in both the countries of origin and Sweden. The decline is in the West often explained by a reduction in the number of orphans and abandoned children eligible for transnational adoption, due to improved living conditions together with an increase in domestic adoption in the countries of origin. At the same time, changes in legislation concerning insemination and IVF as well as new ways of medical treatment of infertility and surrogacy motherhood have grown as alternatives to (transnational) adoption and led to a decrease in the demand for transnationally adopted children (Jonsson Malm 2011; Statskontoret 2021). Presumably, the disclosure of irregularities and criminal acts in the adoption business also plays a role in the decline, especially recently as it has received more public attention. To what extent though is unclear. |
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Bosseldal, I. Traces in the History of Swedish Transnational Adoption—A Diffractive Mapping through the Voices of Adoptees and Their Parents. Genealogy 2024, 8, 67. https://doi.org/10.3390/genealogy8020067
Bosseldal I. Traces in the History of Swedish Transnational Adoption—A Diffractive Mapping through the Voices of Adoptees and Their Parents. Genealogy. 2024; 8(2):67. https://doi.org/10.3390/genealogy8020067
Chicago/Turabian StyleBosseldal, Ingrid. 2024. "Traces in the History of Swedish Transnational Adoption—A Diffractive Mapping through the Voices of Adoptees and Their Parents" Genealogy 8, no. 2: 67. https://doi.org/10.3390/genealogy8020067
APA StyleBosseldal, I. (2024). Traces in the History of Swedish Transnational Adoption—A Diffractive Mapping through the Voices of Adoptees and Their Parents. Genealogy, 8(2), 67. https://doi.org/10.3390/genealogy8020067